❄ but the most special are the most lonely ❄

[letmetakeaselfie]

I. ( tony + steve + bruce )

[ tony's face-plate comes up, all but dragging steve over the threshold. he just has to focus on keeping the super soldier awake so they can get to bruce and get patched up. and then everything will be fine - it'll all be fine. nevermind that cap's best friend is now a psycho killer and is totally on the loose and natasha blew up s.h.i.e.l.d. via the interwebs and put a huge target on all of their heads.

at least he's not panicking.

he has no actual way of knowing how injured he personally is under the suit, either. he's in so much shock and so jacked up on adrenaline that anything is possible. he just hopes it isn't beyond the doctor's scope. JARVIS puts in the passcode wirelessly so tony can carry steve through the door, princess-style. ]

Medic? We need a medic... [ the joke dies on his lips, meeting bruce's gaze across the room. god is he a sight for sore eyes. ]

II. ( tony + steve + bruce + pepper )

[ once tony and steve are cleaned up and back in their street clothes, they may as well get ready for the q&a that's coming. there are a lot of things he's still not willing to discuss - peggy and her husband; his father; bucky... but neither of them are going to get a choice. he loves pepper and bruce with all (both) his heart(s) but this is some heavy shit, so instead he just blurts out the first thing that comes to his mind.

it's also the dumbest. ] Widow will be happy you finally got yourself a date, huh, Cap? [ he nudges the other man's shoulder and looks to everyone else, sorry. that's the best he's got. ]

III. ( tony + steve )

[ tony wanders out to the living room, finding steve out on the couch where he'd left him. he knows just by the unsteady rise and fall of his chest that he's not sleeping. how could either of them after that? without saying a word, he slots his slighter frame in next to him, carefully avoiding both of their injuries and pulling out his phone. ]

I wasn't kidding about that like page, you know. [ he shows cap the facebook fan page that allegedly phil set up. it has a much more flattering image than the twitter. also 14 million something likes. ] You have almost as many fans as me.

[ he's not even being cheeky (much), he has over 19 million. ]

IV. ( tony + pepper )

[ pepper's not up yet and tony hasn't slept yet, which really, if it weren't so commonplace by now might be more traumatic. as it is, he eyes her heels at the base of the bed; she had fallen asleep in her clothes. poor pepper, he'd probably exhausted her and worried her sick with all of this. again, par for their course, but still.

before he can talk himself out of it, he sits on a corner of the bed and goes about trying to get his feet into her shoes. she would totally kill him if she woke up right now, but as they'd established that day they went to the park, it was really hard being short. ] What does she have, elf feet...?

[ he asks the open air, wobbling to his feet and immediately falling to the ground. this wasn't his best laid plan by far. he's just going to lay here for a while. this carpet is soft and his entire body is a bruise. ]

Comments

[letmetakeaselfie]

[ he nods all too knowingly, still squeezing steve in his makeshift hug, but his grip loosens a little. steve won't go anywhere -- he'll stay. they'll figure this out together.

but just in case: ] You know I deserve to exact my pound of flesh, too.

[ a little guilt topper because while he doesn't blame cap for any of the past transgressions against his family, bucky, or peggy -- he will blame him if he's left behind and can't get in his own punches to hydra. they took his fucking parents. ]

[valuedstrength]

[Steve watches him carefully. Maybe it's hilariously wrong to voice concerns about a journey that will inevitably be in part about revenge, but the soldier is doing this anyways.]

Don't let it turn you into something you're not. [With that being said,] But yeah. If there's anyone left to hold accountable for what happened to Howard and your mother, we'll find them.

[He can't imagine they're not all turning on each other right now, inevitably thinning the ranks, like the monsters they are. It's pretty clear from their behavior the second they stopped playing the part of dutiful SHIELD agents they're just as a stupid and petty as he remembered. There might not be anyone to find once it's over, but he's looking anyways.]

[letmetakeaselfie]

[ it's wrong to want them to stick around just so he can be the one to pull the trigger, he knows that. steve knows that, too, but he knows it won't stop either of them from unturning every cave and crevice in their search. they would be relentless, but rats scatter when you chase them, and they would have to be clever. it's a good thing cleverness is a particular strong suit of his.

anger surges through his chest, squeezing around his heart and spurring him into action that he knows can't happen for some time. the waiting will kill him. ]

It's too late for that. [ he had murdered before, and he would do it again. these people were like the terrorists he'd killed; there was nothing human about them. he wouldn't hesitate to take that shot. ]

[valuedstrength]

No, it's not. [He impresses this point as much as he can with his gaze alone. Steve at him with a rare intensity.] There's a difference between putting down a monster because you have to and letting it become all you live to do.

[He's seen it happen to too many soldiers who had every right to be angry and bitter until that became their whole lives. They burned out every time in awful ways. He can't bear that fate falling onto Tony.]

You still have a good heart and if I think for a second that you're losing it over this I'm in the wind. [While he might not be able to stop Tony at that point, he sure as Hell wouldn't stick around to enable him.]

[letmetakeaselfie]

[ in the wind. tony swallows, his own gaze wild and wide as it jumps around the room. it's only now that he pulls away, even if it's only an inch, sitting up properly and tucking his arms in against himself. ]

That's why we have to check each other. [ no running on either side. they were team; family. if one of them started obsessing it was the other's job to get him back on track. he doesn't mind trusting steve with that if he'll allow it to be reciprocated. ]

But you can't leave me, too. [ now his eyes lock on steve. it's not anything but an outright command. he's not allowed to abandon him, not now. not after this. ]

[valuedstrength]

[Steve hadn't expected that reaction. He wanted to impress the seriousness of this onto Tony; not scare him. Once again he gets the feeling like he went down an aisle too quickly and lost his kid at the store. He reaches out to touch one of Tony's arms.] Okay. I won't let it come to that.

[letmetakeaselfie]

[ his expression instantly softens and he nods, letting cap know that his word is enough -- that tony believes him. ]

You know I'll hunt you down. [ much lighter now, but with a sharp undercurrant of truth. ]

[valuedstrength]

Yeah I thought so. [He rubs his eyes. The tears have tampered off finally leaving him with a bright red face.] I wouldn't want you to have to. You're actually pretty terrifying once you set your mind on something.

[He's actually not kidding about that. He'd rather not find out how that turns out for him.]

[letmetakeaselfie]

Capatin America is scared of me? Awesome.

[ he flashes steve a grin and allows his posture to loosen somewhat so their shoulders fit together again. tony lets a beat pass before looking over again. ]

I think there are some cards around here somewhere. Wanna play?

[valuedstrength]

[Steve rolls his eyes and settles back into silence for a moment. He glances back over at the mention and gets caught up in how normal it sounds before nodding.] I could go a round.

[letmetakeaselfie]

[ tony nods, getting up and padding off to find the cards, taking a little longer than was strictly necessary so steve would have time to wash his face and do whatever else he needed to do. but then he's back, opening up the deck and sitting cross legged on one side of the sofa. ]

Gin Rummy's the game. We play to 101 because I don't like even numbers.

[valuedstrength]

[Steve carefully gets off to the couch to pad to the nearest bathroom. After he's scrubbed his face a few hundred times, he emerges. He takes a seat slow and mindful for once.]

Of course you don't. [He doesn't even care since card games were never his specialty. He's resigned to losing badly at this.]

Is it a bad time to mention I haven't played a card game since the forties? [Their deck set on fire. It was a tragedy. :(]

[letmetakeaselfie]

Nah, this is a great time. But is it a bad time for me to mention I only play for money?

[ the most innocent look is this while he shuffles up. ]

[valuedstrength]

[Steve pales. No don't remind him about money right now.] You realize I'm unemployed, right? Plus I owe that guy a truck and a ten dollars worth of toll money.

[His head dips.] Plus I'm probably going to jail for all that other stuff. [He needs to call up Thor for a drink now.]

[letmetakeaselfie]

[ he actually laughs, throwing steve's first card at him hard enough for it to almost turn over. ]

You're not going to jail, okay. You're Captain freaking America. And if it means you know, a lot to you or whatever I'll buy a new Dodge for our friend.

[valuedstrength]

[Steve just wonders what's so funny. This is actually really serious, Tony!!!] I committed a lot of crimes in the past seventy-two hours. I don't see how can avoid it.

[He points at him.] Don't even think about it. This isn't like "accidentally" buying ice cream. I stole his car and it got blown up by HYDRA. It's my responsibility.

[letmetakeaselfie]

We'll write him a note, I think he'll totally understand. [ tony isn't seeing the issue here. ] We'll get a ledger book, okay? I'm keeping track of everything you owe me.

[ he taps the side of his head and deals himself the last card so they both have ten. then he puts the deck face down and flips one over. ]

Remember how to play this one, soldier?

[valuedstrength]

[The note idea actually does calm him down a little until he hears the rest which makes him swallow. Wow he is going to die from stress here. Can he go back outside and fight HYDRA again? That seems simpler.] I remember enough.

[But Rose doesn't so we're just assuming they're playing this game!!]

[letmetakeaselfie]

[ neither of them want the top card, so they play and draw as usual. tony is considering his discard as he reminds himself to call happy and get this truck thing sorted. it was honestly already on his mind since the explosion, and who doesn't want a new car and a thank you from earth's mightiest heroes (yes okay the title had grown on him). ]

You know I was kidding right? About the book. The truck thing is totally happening.

[valuedstrength]

[Steve looks up from his cards with an exasperated frown. He knows there's nothing he can do to stop the other man. One: he doesn't even know if he can access the money he does have considering the fact that yeah he's probably still a wanted criminal. Two: he's no shape to be leaving the safe house to go shopping for cars. Three: Tony's just really stubborn.]

Do you ever listen to anything I say? [Cue a long suffering sigh.]

[letmetakeaselfie]

[ tony looks up from his play and raises an eyebrow. ]

What was that?

[valuedstrength]

[Steve is going to toss a card at his nose like an adult.] Nothing.

[letmetakeaselfie]

[ he flinches, blinking as the card falls into the couch cushion nearest him. ]

Someone's grumpy.

[valuedstrength]

Can't imagine why. [He'll just go ahead and toss another at him. This is actually kind of fun.]

[letmetakeaselfie]

[ tony's head bobs away from the card again and he's struggling with himself not to retaliate, hands practically shaking with the urge to exact juvenile revenge. ]

Didn't expect you to fold so easy, Cap.