trying to find the in betweens-

[letmetakeaselfie]

He knows Steve still doesn't get him. Maybe he doesn't need to. The man was a lot different than the one he'd expected to pop out of the ice anyway, ready made to validate his every fear. That had been naive, sure, but the betrayal still comes as something of a shock. Not because he thinks he deserves better, but because he thought that Steve was better than this. That he knew what teammates really meant.

Tony's been wrong about a lot of things in his life, but to date being wrong about Steve Rogers hurts the most. He knows that's his own fault too -- he had put Steve up on a pedestal rather than regarding him as an equal. They had fought at the Barton's farm and only barely made up. Things are falling apart, and he can't be the only mender anymore.

The phonecall comes late on a Sunday, though not so late that it's crossed over into early again. He just needs to hear this once, in the other man's voice. It isn't about blame, but it is a make-or-break moment.

Comments

[valuedstrength]

Steve is woefully ignorant, but that's the usual when it comes to Tony Stark. He doesn't know what the man is up to half the time. He has too many of his own problems to keep a closer eye on it even after Ultron. Bucky is still in the wind. He's got his hands full training a new team. They're all still waiting on Thor to come back with answers. There's no room in his life to think about what Tony is up to.

Even if they were Steve probably wouldn't think to fit him in. He's still angry at him for a lot of things both earned and unrealistic. He's never really gotten over that initial rejection at such a vulnerable point. Ultron only made it worse. It probably doesn't help he's convinced Bucky probably killed the Starks either. He's got no proof, of course. He barely even got an implication. It's a fear that's been gnawing at him for a while. It makes him hold Tony even further away than he already did.

That's why the call shocks him. He normally doesn't call unless it's business. They're past business hours unless it's a crisis Steve somehow missed. He picks up anyways because they are a team even if they're distant personally. He'll always pick up. "Hey, it's a little late for men my age. Something up?"

[letmetakeaselfie]

The way Steve instantly picks up quickens his heartbeat exponentially, and he hesitates, right at the crucial moment when he knows he has to be on point. "No..." Which is very obviously a lie. Tony swallows and attempts to reroute, but this simple conversation in his head is already twisting up and becoming something he doesn't feel capable of right now. "Sorry. Were you busy?" Or sleeping, like people who aren't as insane as he is? He grimaces, feeling stupid. But that's just how he always feels when talking to Cap. Or any of the team. He doesn't know how to make this sound non-accusatory, and the last thing he wants to expel energy right now is another fight.

[valuedstrength]

It's obviously a lie. Steve isn't in the mood to call him on it. The man is planning to have a quiet evening alone. If he picks a fight with Tony, it obviously won't stop all that quiet. "Not really unless we call sleeping busy work." He lets out a small chuckle. "What's going on? Really. You don't usually call this late unless something is on fire."

[letmetakeaselfie]

Something is on fire, he wants to say. Instead he takes a breath and tries to find the humor in this. Surely there is some, somewhere, if for nothing else than how predictable things like it have come to be for him. "Look, sorry to wake you up... really. But we need to talk." Because everyone loves to hear those words, don't they? Tony grimaces the second they're out. "I found something I think you've been looking for."

[valuedstrength]

Steve winces at the mention of talking. God he already knows he's going to hate this conversation. The rest makes his blood run cold. The thing is he doesn't even consider Bucky first. He thinks of material things lost over the decades. His hopes go dangerously high.

"Is it the stuff from the old apartment? Because if you pulled that off, I might actually kiss you." He thinks he'd actually kill someone to get a hold of a picture of his mother that was lost to time.

[letmetakeaselfie]

His heart lurches out. Steve wouldn't know -- and he still won't -- that Tony has been looking for those very items. To no avail yet, so he doesn't mention the search. "Pepper might have something to say about that," he quips with much less acridity than usual. He sounds exhausted actually. "This is the kind of find I think I should tell you about, in person."

[valuedstrength]

He's about to joke about it being respectful when the other shoe drops. Steve sort of sees it coming. He's already getting up to grab some jeans. The advantages of night showering; he is always ready to roll out of bed and get to work.

"Heard. I can be up and ready in ten. Where should we meet?"

[letmetakeaselfie]

He should pick some place neutral. Some place... public, just in case. "Starbucks on Fifth?" Wait there are two aren't there? "The one near the Empire State building." His heart is already beating five million times per second, but at least if it explodes he won't have to deal with the fallout of this convo. Win-win.

[valuedstrength]

That's... weird. Why wake him up to meet in a public place? Steve quickly brushes it off though. He'll know soon enough. The pause is telling. He's clearly starting to think something is up.

"It'll take me a little longer than ten, but I'll be there. Anything else before I let you go?"

[letmetakeaselfie]

He knows it's weird, but Tony would like to keep... himself in tact. You know, mostly. "It's good news, Cap. Just... don't shoot the messenger." He hangs up, not willing or able to hear anything else from Steve then. He's already ready enough, though he probably looks like shit. Does that really matter?

When Steve arrives, he'll be sat in a far corner dressed in a threadbare Lynyrd Skynyrd t-shirt with a charcoal hoodie layered over it. He's nursing a venti cup of coffee, still steaming with the lid off, and there's a shut laptop leant against his chair. He's more or less expecting Steve to not believe a word that comes out of his mouth.

[valuedstrength]

This is just getting weirder. Steve decides to roll with it. A few broken speed laws later, he's at the meeting place. He looks visibly nervous even while being the more put together of the two in clean dark jeans, light gray t-shirt, and plain black leather jacket.

He sits across from Tony and opens playfully. "You know you're really starting to scare me. Someone blow up your house again?"

[letmetakeaselfie]

He narrows his eyes as he looks up at Steve, like when you look up at the Sun. That's about what it feels like, too. "That's mean-spirited," he points out helpfully, taking another sip so he must not be that broken up about it. "The house is intact, which'll make the buyers happy."

[valuedstrength]

Steve's face falls. "I wasn't trying to be mean." On that much he's complete sincere. He thought Tony would appreciate the joke. What's new though? He's always wrong when it comes to him. The rest doesn't help much either. The Tower had been where it all started so figure it didn't last. "Yeah I read about that. Good for you." He thinks??