penistower | ❄ but the most special are the most lonely ❄

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❄ but the most special are the most lonely ❄

I. ( tony + steve + bruce )

[ tony's face-plate comes up, all but dragging steve over the threshold. he just has to focus on keeping the super soldier awake so they can get to bruce and get patched up. and then everything will be fine - it'll all be fine. nevermind that cap's best friend is now a psycho killer and is totally on the loose and natasha blew up s.h.i.e.l.d. via the interwebs and put a huge target on all of their heads.

at least he's not panicking.

he has no actual way of knowing how injured he personally is under the suit, either. he's in so much shock and so jacked up on adrenaline that anything is possible. he just hopes it isn't beyond the doctor's scope. JARVIS puts in the passcode wirelessly so tony can carry steve through the door, princess-style. ]

Medic? We need a medic... [ the joke dies on his lips, meeting bruce's gaze across the room. god is he a sight for sore eyes. ]

II. ( tony + steve + bruce + pepper )

[ once tony and steve are cleaned up and back in their street clothes, they may as well get ready for the q&a that's coming. there are a lot of things he's still not willing to discuss - peggy and her husband; his father; bucky... but neither of them are going to get a choice. he loves pepper and bruce with all (both) his heart(s) but this is some heavy shit, so instead he just blurts out the first thing that comes to his mind.

it's also the dumbest. ] Widow will be happy you finally got yourself a date, huh, Cap? [ he nudges the other man's shoulder and looks to everyone else, sorry. that's the best he's got. ]

III. ( tony + steve )

[ tony wanders out to the living room, finding steve out on the couch where he'd left him. he knows just by the unsteady rise and fall of his chest that he's not sleeping. how could either of them after that? without saying a word, he slots his slighter frame in next to him, carefully avoiding both of their injuries and pulling out his phone. ]

I wasn't kidding about that like page, you know. [ he shows cap the facebook fan page that allegedly phil set up. it has a much more flattering image than the twitter. also 14 million something likes. ] You have almost as many fans as me.

[ he's not even being cheeky (much), he has over 19 million. ]

IV. ( tony + pepper )

[ pepper's not up yet and tony hasn't slept yet, which really, if it weren't so commonplace by now might be more traumatic. as it is, he eyes her heels at the base of the bed; she had fallen asleep in her clothes. poor pepper, he'd probably exhausted her and worried her sick with all of this. again, par for their course, but still.

before he can talk himself out of it, he sits on a corner of the bed and goes about trying to get his feet into her shoes. she would totally kill him if she woke up right now, but as they'd established that day they went to the park, it was really hard being short. ] What does she have, elf feet...?

[ he asks the open air, wobbling to his feet and immediately falling to the ground. this wasn't his best laid plan by far. he's just going to lay here for a while. this carpet is soft and his entire body is a bruise. ]

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[ Pepper didn't mean to fall asleep at all, much less in her clothes, but the past several days haven't exactly been easy. The whole mess with SHIELD, Tony's absence, dealing with her own safety, keeping abreast of any updates Tony occasionally sent her way while trying to do whatever she could in her end to help and prepare for the aftermath -- as always, she does her best to plan ahead. All of it had been accompanied by constant worry, of course. Needless to say, sleep hasn't been a high priority, lately.

Pepper startles awake with a sharp intake of breath at the thump as Tony goes down, one hand clawing at the sheets as instant panic crawls up her throat, grogginess blurring her ability to think clearly and leaving her unable to immediately remember where she is. A small sound of distress squeaks past her lips, her heart hammering furiously inside her chest. Another second passes until she finally recognizes her surroundings and remembers what's been going on. Relaxing, she faceplants back into the pillows, sighing in relief.

Through a filter of cotton, feathers and unbound hair, she mumbles wearily, ] What are you doing?

[ ...She's fairly sure Tony's around the room. Somewhere. ]

...Nothing. This is a dream. Go back to sleep. [ he mutters into the carpet, sighing softly. he kicks the shoes away from his feet so if she looks over she hopefully won't piece together what he was doing.

he's seriously just going to lay here for as long as he can get away with though. ]

Ohkay. [ She mumbles in sweet, sleepy agreement, not entirely conscious yet. All these years and she still doesn't wake up all that gracefully. A beat later, something finally connects. ] ...Wait.

[ Snuffling a little, she pushes up on the bed, bracing her weight on her arms as she peers down, squinting so hard it's a wonder she actually sees anything at all. In the same sluggish tone of the only half-awake, she wonders, ] Is there a reason you're down there and not up here?

[ tony shuts his eyes, thinking he actually got away with that for a second before -- yeah nope nothing gets by pepper potts he should really know better by now. ]

Too tired to move. [ his voice is muffled in the floor but probably clear enough to be made out. he was already in an extraordinary amount of pain and falling for a really stupid reason didn't help. he knows it's childish and it will only hurt worse if he doesn't get up soon but -- nope. still not moving. ]

[ Slumping back down, Pepper rolls to her side like a lazy cat, still and silent for a moment as she closes her eyes, too, snuggling against the pillows. There's a plaintive note to her voice when she speaks up quietly again. ] But I miss you.

[ Right here next to me. ]

[ his heart pangs with that simple statement, slowly rolling over so he can sit up, watching her from his low vantage point. ] Pepper, I--

[ it isn't time for apologies. will probably never be. but his chest feels like it's caving in on itself from the pressure, heart drumming along with the arc reactor. they both knew he couldn't make promises to stay safe, but he was supposed to at least try. ]

[ There's sleep in Pepper's eyes still when she opens them, watching him underneath heavy lids. A gentle smile pulls at the corner of her mouth, only slightly wistful. She extends her arm across the mattress toward him, curling her fingers just enough to convey a wordless come here. She doesn't need apologies, she just needs him close for a moment before reality intrudes again. ]

[ like he could deny that if he tried. tony gets up with a soft oof, propelling himself forward before he can fully register the pain, fingers brushing hers as he slides in under the covers. ]

[ Nothing comes as naturally these days to her as curling up with Tony, the easy way their bodies fit against one another so perfectly like something predestined. Sighing in contentment, Pepper tangles her legs with Tony's and nudges up to him, carefully so as not to aggravate his bruises and sore muscles. Her mouth brushes softly against his in the softest of kisses, barely a touch of lips. If she actually was a cat, she'd be purring now. ] That's better.

[ his eyes slide closed again, nose butting up against hers and feeling relief setle into his skin. they're all here, his haphazard family, and they're going to get through this. ]

Love you. [ it's barely there, almost on a sigh, leaning into the kiss, however brief. ]

[ With a soft noise of reassurance, Pepper folds one arm up and around his shoulder, carding her fingers through his hair and rubbing lightly along his scalp. ]

I love you too, Tony. [ She lifts her chin and kisses his brow, lingering, before dipping down to his mouth again, a slightly firmer press of lips against his, this time. ] So much.

[ She never has the words to express how much she worries, but then she probably doesn't need to. She'd been truly terrified, not just for Tony but for all of them. She still is, to a certain point. But at least now they're back together, which goes a long way to soothe Pepper's anxieties. ]

[ he kisses back automatically, effortlessly; it's like breathing, and he lets out a soft little sound of approval at the way her hand drags through his hair. she could keep doing that and he'd be totally fine with it. ]

I know. [ it's a reminder that he knows how much he worries her, but he has to do it anyway. maybe steve was right, maybe it was time pepper had her own suit. he can't worry about that now though, shifting to bury his face against her throat. ]

They killed them, Pepper. My parents. They killed them. [ they. not he. not bucky; not the winter soldier. hydra. he refused to give them what they wanted and blame someone who couldn't make a choice for himself one way or another. and now that natasha leaked everything the whole world would know, and that pissed him off. his whole life had been in the public eye so why not this?

but it wasn't fair. it just wasn't. ]

Oh, Tony. [ The murmur is barely audible, a world of empathy in the simple syllables. Pepper presses her arm against his back and shoulder tighter, trying her best to envelop him in her arms as completely as possible, as if holding him to her more firmly could somehow make it hurt less. Her fingers never stop running through his hair. ] I'm so sorry.

[ Her heart aches for him. The loss of his parents in that accident has always been a sore spot, but to find out after all these years that it hadn't been an accident in the least? She squeezes her eyes shut against the angry tears that threaten to well up at the unfairness of it all, of wasted lives and simple wickedness of the people responsible.

But she won't fall apart when Tony needs her. Sighing quietly, she drops a kiss into his hair. ] They'll get what they deserve in the end.

[ She has to keep believing that. It's the only way to carry on. ]

[ he does his best to disappear against her body, shaky hands winding around her waist and clutching at her top. he's incensed by her statement, because they will pay. steve and himself will make sure of that. ]

Don't be. It's good-- good to finally know.

Still. [ Her response is barely a whisper, so faint it's almost inaudible. Her fingertips run along his scalp, slipping down and digging in to gently massage the back of his neck and the base of his skull. Sighing tiredly, she can't help but murmur, sorrowfully, ] God, what a mess this is.

[ As grateful as she is that Steve and Tony both came back more or less in one piece physically, the mental repercussions of everything that had came to light would be felt for a long time to come. ]

[ he needs to believe it's better to know. that he can avenge his father and put something right for once. her soothing ministrations just make him cling on tighter, struggling with himself not to cry. he had held it together so steve could fall apart and now he was going to unravel on pepper. he could feel it but still he's fighting; he doesn't know how to stop. ]

You're telling me. [ he murmurs into her skin, already blinking back tears of his own. goddamnit. ]

[ She can feel the tell-tale tension about his frame, the subtlest waver in his voice and the brush of long eyelashes against her skin. He's strained to the breaking point, and she can't imagine anything right now that hurts her more than to witness Tony's pain. She pushes past it, though, knowing she needs to be Tony's shoulder to cry on now. Though she hates that it's necessary, she's still honored he trusts her this much. She'd never let that trust down if she could help it. ]

It's alright to let go, honey. [ Nuzzling against his hair, she vows on a whisper, ] I'm here for you. Always.

[ her words are like flipping a switch, and the dam releases almost immediately after. her blouse is wet in instants and he can't conceal the loud, wretched sobs that seem to course all the way up from his toes before finally bursting up the back of his throat, unbidden.

this new information had forced him to reconsider damn near everything his father ever did -- said. even moreso than what peggy had told him. he felt like his entire childhood may as well have been a tv sitcom for all he could actually trust its sincerity. ]

[ Pepper folds him in her arms tighter as the sobs finally break through and wreck his body, occasionally murmuring soothing words into his ear, half of it likely nonsense. Dainty hands stroke his back and delve into his hair, press him against her as if she could absorb half of his pain onto herself. She lets him cry on her for as long as it takes until his tears are spent. Her own eyes burn too, but she ignores it the same way she ignores the fabric of her blouse clinging wetly to her chest, focusing on her mostly silent reassurances instead, on soothing Tony however she can. ]

Oh god, Pepper. [ his heart is breaking -- he's falling apart and her arms coupled with his own desperate grip in her clothes are the only things holding him together. ]

Steve actually tried to tell me this was all his fault. Who the fuck does he think he is? [ still crying, but it's taken on an almost angry edge. ]

[ It doesn't matter if he does. She'd be there to put him back together, as always. Times like these, she can be strong enough for both of them. One palm curves over the back of his neck, her sigh disappearing into this hair and heart breaking for both Steve and Tony. ]

He's grieving, same as you are. [ She can understand where Steve's mind has gone with that, even if she doesn't agree with it. ]

That doesn't give him the right-- [ he catches that righteous edge in his own voice and it dissolves into sobs all over again, rubbing his face against her shoulder miserably. ]

He thinks he's worthless. Because I'd waste my time on him if he was. [ it's easier to couch it in terms of himself. if steve thinks he makes everything about him, he'll make everything about him. fuck it. ]

You'll prove him wrong. [ She finally murmurs back, gently but firmly, fingers of one hand delving back into his hair. ] And I'll help you.

[ It's that simple and yet, not at all. But Pepper doesn't think there's any point of arguing the issue, not when every nerve is rubbed raw by the recent events and tempers are running high. ]

[ he nods, pulling back an inch to wipe his face on his sleeve before redoubling his efforts to disappear against her. pepper always knew just what to say. ]

Could you-- just tell me something good. Anything. Make it up, I don't care.

[ She has some things to tell him about her clean-up after the SHIELD implosion, in regards to SI specifically, but though she considers it good news, she doesn't think Tony wants to hear about anything business related right now. There's time for that later. ]

Well... I finally beat level 147 in Candy Crush without JARVIS helping me even once.

IV.

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