And you could have it all - My empire of dirt.

[letmetakeaselfie]

Rhodey is distracting the government types long enough for Tony to hack into the airspace and make sure none of this is being recorded. He loops the moments before the Milano pierces the atmosphere and plays them back, knowing by the time he's out of the system and they figure it out they won't be able to prove it was anything but a technical malfunction. He does all of this from his phone as he stands near the landing pad with Steve flanking his side. He's trying to do things right this time -- no more lone gunslinger act, as Pepper had phrased it.

He looks over his sunglasses at the spaceship as it decompresses, wondering who he's just invited over for dinner. Hopefully they're friendly... When the platform descends it really is just like Close Encounters of the Third Kind. He can't help but geek out a little. He'd technically met space aliens before, and Asgardians, etc. but somehow this is way cooler. "Welcome to Earth and please watch your step, we don't have liability insurance yet."

Comments

[valuedstrength]

While he enjoyed the party, it did bring home how real the threat they were facing was. Relaxing isn't really in the cards. The second it's alright to do so he commits himself to training. He's not going to lose anyone if he can help it. His blind determination keeps him from noticing Natasha right away. Once he does, he makes an effort to wind down so he can stop just in time for her to call him out.

"Hey." He turns to her, wiping sweat from his brow a second later. "Something going on?" Like she can't just say hello or something.

[relicta]

She makes a face at him and pushes off the wall, moving like a cat on the prowl on her way towards him. Maybe she should let it go today of all days, but no, she can't. They're supposed to be partners in this and she can't have him shutting down like this, not again. Not when she knows what it leads to. "Why don't you tell me." Natasha stands only a foot or so away now, too close for him to continue his self-flaggelation, and crosses her arms across her chest. Only she could make it look intimidating in clothes slightly too big for her while she looks all the way up at him.

[valuedstrength]

His defenses visible go up by the way his whole frame tenses. It unnerves him sometimes how well she can see him now. Natasha knows something is up. He can't even begin to try to hide it. That doesn't mean he won't deflect like a pro.

"We have a lot ahead of us. I'm just trying to get ready for it."

[relicta]

"Uh-huh." She's not buying it, clearly, judging by the way she works her jaw and narrows her eyes. "You do know we're not in a Rocky movie, right?" Just checking.

[valuedstrength]

"I know we're not in a Rocky movie." Steve argues a little irritably. He knows he has to give her something. He can't shut her out completely when she's right in front of him. Steve runs his fingers through his hair and sighs.

"I remember what an enhanced human being with Thanos' ambition did with one stone. You can't blame me for being worried about it." Or rather reliving the horrible details with every swing of his fist. These are good people. He remembers a little too well how it felt to carry Pietro in his arms after Ultron. He doesn't want to do it again.

[relicta]

She nods, patiently waiting for him to give it up. And the second he does, her expression softens and her arms fall to her sides. "We're all worried," she points out, not trying to invalidate his feelings. Or even how he chooses to deal with them -- i.e. harp on them without dealing with them at all. She's been doing a little of that too herself. She's pretty sure they all have. The difference is, Steve is already thinking about how to lay himself down to protect them all, while she and Tony and everyone else are banding together. It's times like this she wants to hit him and hug him all at once and she gets why Bucky sometimes does both at the same time. "But... you're just as valuable as any of our guys out there." She needs him to remember that, finally reaching out for his arm and squeezing in a way she hopes cements that she's here for him.

[valuedstrength]

He scoffs at that, glancing down at where her hand touches his arm. Steve knows she's there for him. It never seems to reach in all the way. He still feels alone even with all of them surrounding him.

"You sure about that? The last time I died for nothing." Which is kind of the problem. He historically doesn't do to well in these fights. While he's happy to play martyr again he wants it to count. He's afraid it'll be a waste again.

[relicta]

Okay, now she really wants to hit him. Briefly, she looks angry, her hand tensing where it's connected to him; but she softens just as fast, pulling him into a loving if forceful embrace. Natasha stands up on her tiptoes so she can press her face into his shoulder, sighing loudly in response to all that he's just said -- and hasn't.

"Don't die at all this time. That was the point." The point he always seems to miss.

[valuedstrength]

He braces himself for a hit that doesn't quite come. The hug is forceful, but it's also welcome. Steve hesitates briefly before tightly wrapping his arms around her in return. He rests his chin on her head and sighs as well. He's still not heavily invested in living, but he wants to be. He's trying for their sake.

"You can't die either." That would really be the final straw for him.

[relicta]

She rubs her hand over one broad shoulder, the other gripping his arm in a white knuckle grasp. "Deal," she says, hating that it sounds watery. She told herself she wasn't going to cry. But after everything they'd been through... Zola, Bucky, Sokovia... They had an undeniable bond that was tested and true. She refuses to give up when the alternative is him dying for literally nothing. "Promise?" It's said into his ear, her voice pitched high and vulnerable.

[valuedstrength]

It's difficult to hear the vulnerability in her voice and know he's the source of it. His dramatics are clearly hurting her. He hates that he's done this without ever realizing the consequences before this.

(Funny how her feelings are more important than his life. He can't harm another woman the way he did Peggy.)

Steve nods, unable to hold back the shiver from the sensation of hot breath on his ear. "I promise. I'm not going anywhere, Nat."

[relicta]

She clings to him for as long as she'll let herself get away with, wishing she could believe the pledge he just made to her. "You know I'm going to hold you to that," she threatens, her hand skipping up to the back of his neck as she draws away inch by inch. Maybe this was a mistake, their faces are so close their breathing mingles. Her eyes flash. She can't lose him; she won't.

[valuedstrength]

It is definitely a mistake or so Steve thinks. The little hairs on his arms raise up as their breaths mingle. He leans forward unconsciously. All he can think about is what it would be like to kiss her this time. Dealing with that determination in her eyes, knowing deep down she really can't trust him, is too much to bear.

"I know." That's the best he can offer really. She'll try, he'll try, and someone will win in the end.

[relicta]

She's having the same thought, eyes lidding halfway like she expects him to make a move. Her breathing goes shallow, and when it becomes clear he isn't moving she starts pulling away measure by measure. It physically hurts to be apart from him, but she tries not to note it -- it isn't like they have time for that fuck before you die stuff, right? "Good." It's softer than her last declaration, but no less meaningful. It's a verbal acceptance of whatever comes next. Now she knows he'll at least have to think about her before martyring himself, not that it made a difference before. She can still hope, and for someone who's seen a myriad of fucked up shit, she still has quite a lot of it.

"I guess I'm gonna go. Let you get back to... punching stuff." Her eyes flick to the door and then back to him, her hand drawing back down his arm reluctantly and deliberately slow. It's clear in her body language she doesn't want to go.

[valuedstrength]

As she pulls away, he hates himself for his cowardice. The world, the galaxy, could come to an end and he won't even kiss someone he feels close to; someone he acknowledges as a partner and fellow leader. What is wrong with him? It's not as though he's being respectful of Bruce's passing interest that ended in disaster. It's just him being unable to take the next step personally as usual.

He grabs her retreating arm in a fit of frustration. Thankfully the soldier is just upset enough at himself that he doesn't look down to take in what he's done and back off in some gentlemanly (and unnecessary) gesture. "Don't. Could you please just-" He sighs in frustration at himself.

Don't put it on her. Speak for yourself.

"Let's do something; anything. I don't want you to go."

[relicta]

The internal struggle he's having is more than apparent, though she has nothing to indicate what it's actually about. He's still thinking suicidal thoughts for all she knows. That is, until he speaks up. As exhausted as she is, she's never once refused him something he's asked for directly -- she prefers that, always. It's too hard to sift through her own feelings let alone someone else's. She opens her mouth to say something placating, but then he grabs on and the desperation in his eyes comes to the fore. Natasha frowns, but remains steadfastly in his orbit.

"Hey..." It's gentle, questing. She wants to do something for him now; anything that would ease the pressure. "We could play XBox." It's a little playful despite everything, she tries for a smile though it comes out slightly strained.

[valuedstrength]

Steve looks down. She's meeting him halfway. That does a little to help his desperation even as something else, a need he can't identify, nags underneath the surface. "Something light and fun. We got something like that, right?" He looks up and forces a smile. He can't really play Call of Duty or Halo on a night like this.

[relicta]

She is always the first to recognize when Steve needs to be taken care of. Easily shelving her own issues, she takes his hand and squeezes it gently. She would do anything for him, and this team. The human race is at stake but here in this room it's just them, and that's comforting. That makes sense.

"Yeah, I have something like that. Do you want to get changed? I'll make tea."

[valuedstrength]

He smiles at the pressure, relaxing visibly. They're going to game; they'll be together. For now things will be okay, right? "Yeah... I better shower. I don't want to smell like a gamer." He smiles wryly at his own joke. "I'll see you in fifteen."

With that, he reluctantly lets go to hit the showers.

[relicta]

She smiles back, loving that she can have that affect on him. "Perish the thought." Ignoring the way her heart flutters, she nods at his lame joke and manages to pull herself away. Steve heads to the showers and she heads to the kitchen to boil water. Chamomile tea with extra honey is a good, distracting project for the moment. Natasha manages to miraculously dodge anyone else in the house still up on the way back to her room with still boiling hot tea. She sets both mugs down on her nightstand before kicking off her shoes and pulling up her blankets in order to sit on top of them. Nat rests back against one pillow and picks up her controller, queueing up none other than Lego Avengers. This should take their mind off things!!

[valuedstrength]

He comes back in the promised amount of time in dark blue gym pants and yet another ridiculously tight grey t-shirt. Steve shoves his wet hair off to one side as he enters the room, significantly calmer than when they parted earlier.

Steve quickly finds himself smiling like a fool at the sight of her choice. He unironically loves what little he's played of this far more charming version of their adventures together. "Did I mention you're the best partner a guy could have?"

He doesn't waste any time taking his spot, back barely hitting the pillow before he reaches for the controller. He takes in a deep breath and glances over at her. "The tea smells fantastic by the way."

[relicta]

"Hmm... No, I don't think you did. Go on." She grins over at him and gets ready to solve puzzles as a tiny lego version of herself. How great. Though it's hard not to be distracted by the sight he makes, does he buy those skintight t-shirts in bulk or what? "...Help yourself." To tea. Her mouth goes dry.

[valuedstrength]

He throws a put upon look her way as he readies himself to play his favorite character... Iron Man. Steve loves to fly around the city and shoot things with lasers. No one should ruin this for him.

At any rate, he finally takes a small sip of tea and adds playfully, "You make drinkable tea. That's something to add to the list." Of reasons she's a great partner obviously.

[relicta]

She always smiles when he picks Tony, even though she knows he will by now every time. Sometimes Nat likes to play as Bruce too because it's hilarious to make him transform into Lego Hulk. And she also doesn't have to be as vigilant about enemy attacks. Playing as Clint sucks, don't ever try it.

"As opposed to...?" She takes a sip of her own tea before setting it back down and knocking her elbow into his playfully. "You're not so bad yourself."

[valuedstrength]

"The kind that tastes like dirt." Aka the kind he enjoyed overseas during the war. He will never forgive or forget!!! But, in all seriousness, Steve smiles boyishly when she bumps into him.

"Not so bad, huh? That's a nice way of saying pain in the ass, Nat." His eyes flash in gratitude. He knows he's a handful. It means a lot that she sticks by him all the same.